Wednesday, January 12, 2011

1-12-11

Recovering from the pneumonia has been much harder than I anticipated. My old crunchy lung cilia just ain't what it used to be. I was unable to work this weekend, so that is two weeks without pay....what a great way to start the year.

I did make a trip to the grocery store this weekend to stock up for the winter storms. It was exhausting just walking around with the extra weight of the coat I was wearing. Really, really surprising to me how easily fatigued I am. I am doing my little lung exercisey thingee...my capacity is almost normal.

The kids were being....kids yesterday and I could not walk and yell at them at the same time. So you have to be good or be still, you can't be bad on the move!

I crocheted a new afghan in 5 days, that is a new record. You can get a lot of crocheting done when you just have to sit still and breathe.

Frustrated and gloomy....but I will feel better.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

1-5-11

After a few weeks of my breathing getting better, then worse, then better again, I ended up in the hospital for four days with pneumonia. I wasn't expecting that at all! I am home but still pretty ill, on house arrest and just sitting and breathing.

I think I am still a tad depressed, I was scared but a little OK with dying. There is just an odd OKness with my mortality that I didn't have before. Dying would suck, but I guess my ducks are in a row better now and I have had some time to digest it. I am not planning on dying, but the idea doesn't piss me off like it used to.

I am sure I need therapy for that.