Saturday, October 9, 2010


Nothing new in the cancer department, I'll get another PET scan in November. I did tell the doc-ish people about my fears of brain mets, not that I have them now, but that I will develop them. A young lady in my community was declared cancer free and six months later was having brain surgery for mets. That scares the hell out of me.

I was answering a "cancer questionaire", those things always make me feel like I am flunking cancer class. Some of the questions were about what changes I have made in my life, what lessons I have learned... I haven't learned much except a whole bunch about cancer. I keep thinking there should be some great lesson and many of the questionaires implies there should be a great lesson. But I am not oozing inner peace, no epiphany, no near death appreciation for life.

I was thinking about the latin prefix 'meta' as in metamorphosis and metastisis. To change forms or to change from stable, I think there is a cool train of thought there.

I'll update if this train of thought gives me the great life changing epiphany. But if I have the big epiphany, I may get a letter in the mail saying that I cannot share it with regular people, it is reserved for cancer peeps. I think that is what those cancer questions are about, people want the big secret and they don't want to have to go bald to get it.

There is no big secret, just baldness.

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