My scan is scheduled for next Monday, the 15th. I will see Onc on the 18th for the results and for my IV treatment. I feel much better now, just getting that decision made. I have no idea what the big deal was, why did they even ask me if I wanted to scan? Why not just go ahead and do it like we had planned on in June? That would have saved me all this mental hamster wheel churning.
The fear is what is the worst. Treatments, surgery, side effects, all that sucks but is completely do-able. It is the fear that sucks the worst. And it is no as much fear for myself and what my future holds; it is more about what the kids are going to have to deal with. This has to be changing who they are.