Monday, February 15, 2010

02-15-10

I wish I had deep and thought provoking stuff to post. I wish that I was one of those people that had this huge shift in my disposition when I was diagnosed. But, I don't think I did and I have nothing deep nor thought provoking to share.

I had to have a impromptu echocardiogran today at the last minute. My usual echo guy is, well... a guy. This time, I went to a different place and a lady did the echo. It is interesting to me how different a man and a woman clinician deal with my chest area. They are dealing with my heart and I still have a boob on that side. Echo man is always very thoughtful, very discreet and has not seen my boob even though he does the little ultrasound all around it. Echo chick was less thoughtful, les discreet, boob flooping around out in the open.

Personally, it is not a big deal to me. During the test, the boob is a mass of fatty tissue sitting on top of important stuff. But, as a health care professional, I can imagine how frustrating it may be for some women to deal with the loss of privacy. So Kudos to you Echo Dude, you do a great job!

New chemo regimen starts tomorrow. So, possible reality change tomorrow. I try not to read too much about all the crappy side effects as I am pretending that this will be easier than the last round and I don't want to mess up my pretty delusion with nasty facts and stats.

I worked at the nursing home bald and sans hat all weekend. Everybody was pretty cool with it. I get hot flashes, a lot, my head feels like it is on fire. I am tired of being hot, so I went without a hat. I figure it is pretty obvious that I am bald even with a hat, it is not like I am fooling anyone. I'll still try and do my best to keep my head covered for my Mom, she digs denial, it's her thing.

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